crazy awesome

So we all knew this was on its way; it was inevitable and fairly obvious that at some point people would realize that most genetic deficiencies could be supplemented/erased by taking various vitamin cocktails. Most geneticists have been anticipating this for about a decade now.

But the awesome part of this all was that I had a visionary flash of the future: someday, we'll all be able to go to a DNA consultant, have our genomes mapped out for us, and they'll tell us what we need to do to live to be two hundred, avoid cancer, alzheimers, and parkinsons, and then we'll all just take our own personal vitamin cocktail for the rest of our lives. I say DNA consultant instead of doctor, because lets face it, doctors dont really know anything about DNA. And I don't trust doctors; they make too much money even when they don't cure anything. But a true, capitalist based industry such as DNA consulting would actually work. And DNA biologists actually know what they're talking about.

Ten years from now, there will be more online dating sites like eharmony and scientificmatch, a little known site that is locally based because it matches people based on pheromone DNA, ensuring fabulous chemistry. But there will be dating sites that match people based on how awesome their children could be too, ensuring top notch reproductive success.

Why is this a breakthrough? Because up until now pretty much the most effective cure all is daily exercise and not smoking. Thats boring. Taking vitamin supplements to maximize your DNA efficiency is way more awesome. In fact, I want to be a DNA consultant. Nobody steal my idea. If I had no other goals for my life, I'd totally get the capital together to do this and travel the world telling people which vitamins to take.


NOTE: IF YOU ARE A PREGNANT MOTHER:

TAKE LOTS OF CHOLINE. Eat hardboiled eggs and fish, up to the daily threshold limit. You can also buy the vitamin supplement at most drug stores. Your kids will be awesome.

god science is so freaking cool.